All 9 movie Reviews


Biosock Biosock

Rated 3 / 5 stars

Meh...amusing but average

Dude, so obviously just ripped this off from Family Guy. In fact, in fine print on your description it says, "Helz yeah, I just ripped this sh*t off of Family Guy, ain't I the shiznit?!"

Seriously though, I appreciate a good parody as much as the next guy but this had very little actual Bioshock content. It was like you just used Bioshock characters to get a lot of extra hype for some random humor that wouldn't have been popular otherwise. I can understand video game character cameos if they make sense in the context, but not when their just put into random stories to get extra views (though the guitar shredding plasmid in the beginning was funny). The graphics and animation were very average, which is perfectly fine. Newgrounds is a place for hobbyists and to expect professional performance from everyone would be ridiculous. So overall it had average animation, average graphics, average jokes, average voice acting (hey, not everyone can afford to hire eggoraptor) that just happened to use Bioshock to get a little extra popularity. That get's you in the mid 3's for scoring in my book and it seems everyone else would agree.


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The Hobbit - Act I The Hobbit - Act I

Rated 3 / 5 stars

Nice to see you back.

It really is nice to see you animating again. I know you're not professional and most of the gigantic fanbase you once had is gone but it's always good to see an average joe make a flash.

Newgrounds has changed greatly since your heyday. It's professionals' only now. You anticipated that expert animators to take the top spots in the portal and quite frankly I couldn't be happier with that. It's given the site a new legitimacy that it never had. You've admitted yourself that you're not a good animator and I'm not going to be the mindless fanboy of yours I was in middle school and deny that truth. That's why I'm giving you a six out of ten. The flash was all pretty average. The skills that it takes to tween a simple character model are minuscule, the humor was predictable (though you should get points for the Tom Bombadil reference), and your art style is undefined (disclaimer: I can't draw for crap).

But hey, that's fine. You still have a right to put something here like everybody else. Internet flash animating in general has become a contest on who can be more professional then the other guy. It's no longer a place where the every man can just roll up his sleeves on a few Saturday's and put out a video game parody for the fun of it. The blam system, once in place to prevent porn adds and people who didn't know what file type to use, now blams people for not being professionals in their work. Tweening, sprites, fan parodies, and other tools for people new to newgrounds so they can animate for the fun of it are forbidden. They're now seen as sins against mankind itself. The feeling drives off the mystic feel of wonder I had as a kid to say, "Hey, I can make a cartoon!"

I'll admit there is some justification in it. Some people with no animating skills whore their work and stretch pointless concepts just to squeeze money from their depleting fanbase (illwillpress) and some good hearted hobbyists feel that their home learned flash skills are enough for them to warrant professional recognition (Wonchop). I can see how the community would get angry with that or how professional animators would rightfully feel credit is wrongfully being diverted away from them. But kids who watch an amateur flash movie like yours, who to them "It's time for the rave!" jokes are outright hilarious and think, "Hey, I can can make a cartoon TOO" are unfortunately caught in the crossfire of it all.

I know that this rant had very little to do with your movie and the two people who would read this would rightfully find this review unhelpful. But it was a concern I had to get off my chest and you making a return seemed like a good opportunity. I know you won't read any of this either 8D

Either way, I'm glad your still animating now matter how unprofessional you are. The average Joe (in this case, the average Joe Blanchette har har har) has the same right to submit as everyone else. After all, our new motto is Everything , by Everyone. May your fanboys not delude you and your haters not blam you. And god forbid any other review is as long and pointless as mine :-)


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Metropolis Circuit Metropolis Circuit

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Made of Awesome

Far be it from me to read your reviews, but I've noticed that you've been taking a little crap from people saying this is exactly like Race++. Now that they mention it, I see some similarities (Boy and Girl with gadgets racing downhill to music in a somewhat futuristic city that has blimp(s)), but I know those similarities are inconsequential. That flash was 3 years ago and it didn't establish any monopolies on races so far as I know. And besides, Vinnie never created an ongoing story to his stuff while you've said this will be the beginning of a major one. If you'll excuse the nerdy analogy, I know that this flash has about similarity to Race++ as The 1986Transformers movie had to Star Wars.

At this point I WOULD like to review the animation itself, but I can't. The problem was that this made at a professional level with more effort then I could probably comprehend (and that I can't animate). If Adam Phillips had a monopoly on epic animations, you've certainly taken busted that with this flash. *thumbs up* You not shaded everything, but added color gradients to every...single...frame. Wow.

Now go make the next one!



Blamformers! Blamformers!

Rated 3 / 5 stars

Horrible way to start site relaunch

Penis joke! lolololololol
Guy gets crush in transformation! lololololololol
Guy with penis gets crushed in transformation! lolololololol

The only reason this is getting 6 is because plenty of the the graphics were very decent. Not only that, but not everyone made a penis joke (though most people did). Most of the artists really put a lot of work into their drawings and there was plenty of impressive animation (some of which even used extensive fbf). The 6 stars is their congratulations for a job well done in that respect.

That being said, this is a horrible way to go into the site relaunch after the new redesign. This collab was a big project with multiple big name flash artists that were supposed to greet the latest design of the site with pride (Hell, Tom Fulp himself participated!). Yet those opportunities were completely thrown out the window with joke after joke based around male genitalia. Is there something hilarious about dicks that I'm not getting? Is this comedy gold on a level that my brain just can't understand? Or are you just trying to substitute actual humor for being controversial? And the dick jokes are not only redundant, they fail actually to be funny.

What's worse is the fact that this wave of dick joke after dick joke was actually sponsored by the site itself! Is this actually the official model movie of what we want new newgrounds to be about? I hope the blitzkrieg of penis jokes is just a fad on the site. Because although graphics are a very important part of every flash movie, they become useless when the only thing they're used to express are 30 penis jokes. With this movie, my first impression of new newgrounds is completely ruined.

Oh, and the guy gets crushed in transformation joke? That's been done, ALOT. That being said, kudos to all the non-penis joke flash artists in here. Many of them made me laugh out loud (Megatron ordering a PRIME rib and Transformers learning English were the best).



The NG Redesign Collab The NG Redesign Collab

Rated 2.5 / 5 stars

What's with all the penis jokes?

The only reason this is getting 5 is because the graphics were very decent.
Most of the artists really put a lot of work into their drawings and some of them did some quite nice animation. The 5 stars is their congratulations for a job well done in that respect.

That being said, this is a horrible way to go into the site relaunch after the new redesign. Both this collab and the transformers collab were big projects with multiple flash artists that were supposed to greet the latest design of the site with pride. Yet those opportunities were completely thrown out the window with joke after joke based around male genitalia. Is there something hilarious about dicks that I'm not getting? Is this comedy gold on a level that my brain can't comprehend? Or are you just trying to substitute actual humor for being controversial? And the dick jokes are not only redundant, they fail actually to be funny. Usually the joke doesn't go farther then saying "look! there's a penis! lololol"

I hope the wave of dick jokes is just a fad on the site. Because although graphics are a very important part of every flash movie, they become useless when the only thing they're used to express are 16 penis jokes. And between this flash movie and the transformers collab, my first impression of new newgrounds is completely ruined.



Sprite Diapers Sprite Diapers

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

It's not the first anti-n00b flash I've seen...

..but it still made me rotflolmao. These flashes come by every now and again to give n00bs a good swift kick in the ass. And in my opinion, that ass doesn't get kicked enough sometimes.



Revenge of the Seph Revenge of the Seph

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

Give those fanboys what for!

Bwahahaha! That's a nice little statement. "To those fanboys who would downvote a movie solely because I make a popular character look like a raging dofus, I SAID GOOD DAY!" As for the actual quality of the movie, I found the character models visually appealing (and hilarious, for the FF fans), the sound good ("shoot em in the head and they'll stay dead!"), and the jokes funny if you knew the context. I don't quite believe it was front page worthy as a stand alone, but I shouldn't criticize since I couldn't make anything better :P. And, with the context of your last front page movie, then I can see why it would be on the front page.



the YuYu the YuYu

Rated 5 / 5 stars

The quality wasn't what surprised me.

I’m sure you’ve heard all this before, but I’ll say it again. You are the best independent animator I have ever seen and it gives me a great pleasure to watch your cartoons. Your spin on Celtic knowledge goes great with your music, which you compose yourself. Your expertise in water, smoke, and effects of the like give your cartoons a unique style from any other animation I’ve seen. I acknowledge the fact that this has all been said to you before, but you more then deserve to hear it a thousand times more.

Now, this is undoubtedly my favorite Brackenwood movie because something happened that I wasn’t expected. Bitey got into a high-speed battle scene with the Yuyus. While there has been some limited combat in your movies up until this point, they were never on such a large scale. This movie focused on the battle as well as the mystical element (with that one humorous element when he’s running as well). And I have a soft spot in my heart for high-speed battles. This is has truly been my favorite episode of the series, and I dearly hope you shall be producing more in the future.



Naruto - Dueling Genin's Naruto - Dueling Genin's

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

Good, but a little more effort would have helped

It's true that the Naruto flashes have been pouring in, but I'm a huge Naruto fan, so I don't really care about that.

Graphic wise, it was good. I'm impressed with you ability to draw so many different figures to make this flash movie. I also like how you changed the Saske's image when Neji was looking for the chakra openings. However there was one thing I noticed that bothered me. You shaded some of the images, but not all. A little bit more effort would have gone a long way in that respect. If you had gone through all that trouble making the movie, why not take that last step and shade the rest of the graphics?

Stylewise, I liked it. Naruto pwns everything known to mankind, so no complaints from me in that respect. Once again, createing new graphics for every fight stance must have taken some work. Also, I'm glad you made Neji win. I'm sick of that Sasuke pretty boy getting all the glory :P. One question, how could Neji possibly live through a direct hit with the chidori?

Overall, I really enjoyed the movie and I'm glad you took the time to make it. Thanks!


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